November 20, 2010
Oh the circle of life... I have been......ahem.....er.....ah......shall we say; 'tough' on my mother about injuries and illnesses from my and my brothers' childhood that were given a "You're fine...." and then turned out to be something rather than nothing. - I now understand................... Don't get me wrong, I still am of the old school "Just rub some dirt on it" mind, but I might now be a bit more empathetic.
If my children are anything like my brothers and I were like, well then.... Not only have there been a myriad of injuries and illnesses....this is only the beginning. Maybe that is parenthood, maybe it's childhood. Maybe kids are supposed to get hurt and fake hurt and always be needing some sort of comforting, healing, attention. But Gigi...... Gigi has drama down to an art form. She is a master at manipulation.... When she is in trouble and about to be punished, I would bet you $1,000,000.00 that before you can do anything she has to stop the world because "I have a scratch" or for those of you that don't speak Gigi, you have to wait while she itches a fake itch on her knee, or leg or arm. When she doesn't want to do something her excuse is ALWAYS "I can't do it.... *whine* my knees hurt.... *more whining*"
So today, in the middle of a naptime war between Her Royal Highness and myself she began screaming that she couldn't "march her butt back into her room" because her knee was broken. I tried to stand her up several times and each time she collapsed in a heap refusing to bear any weight on her left leg. *annoyed* I carried her into her room, put her in bed and told her to TAKE A NAP!
I sat there for a few minutes reviewing her dance/gymnastics class in my mind. we had only just returned from class when this all went down.... But she didn't complain in the car or on the way to the car, in class or after class. I have no idea when or how she could have hurt herself.
The nap didn't happen-- Hubby returned from golf and granted HRH reprieve from her refusal to sleep. But she persisted in her inability to walk. I return from the grocery store and she is still quite "in character" about this "whole knee thing" --- Her best buddy, Vincent comes over to play for an hour before dinner and for the first half of his visit she cries and whines on the floor that she can't walk, but then..... There we go.... "Ah-Ha! FAKER! I saw you run/walk!!" But she maintains her knee "weally, weally hurts"
Dinner, bath, bed all the same, same knee, same complaint - Although we've looked, poked, prodded, bent and otherwise examined the knee in question. we can see no sign of injury, there is no swelling and shw only complains about pain when she puts weight on the leg.... Someone really needs to explain the whole "Boy who cried wolf" philosophy to my 3 year old. Hubby and I are not sure what to do. It is possible that she really is injured. But she is ALWAYS telling us she's hurt. She's cut, bumped, bruised, this hurts, that hurts, she needs ice.... tears, drama the whole nine yards.... all. the. time.
So Hubby and I decided that sleep will determine real or fake. If she wakes up and is still complaining she needs to see a doctor, if not then.... well..... we were right. 10pm Hubby goes in to her room, gets her out of bed like every night to go potty. Gigi is the heaviest sleeper ever. she could sleep through WWIII.... She always "sleep walks" to the potty, in part because we want her to get used to getting herself up to go and in part, I will admit because she is so darn cute when she's ''sleep trudging" into the bathroom. Not tonight, she was sleep limping. Clearly not awake, not awake enough to remember to fake this injury..... Gigi, at age 3 has suffered her first sports injury and we didn't believe her.
I'm torn, like the mother who loses her child in a public place and is SO HAPPY to find him or her but was so beyond terrified that instead of simply embracing the child, screams at him/her how wrong they were to wander off.... I am torn between hugging her close and telling her how very sorry I am that she is hurt and I didn't believe her and eating myself up with guilt..... and shaking her and saying "If you would stop crying all the time and stop complaining about fake injuries and your knees hurting all the time, I would have believed you right away!!!"
Tomorrow we go to the doctor for a look at the knee, but since all I can come up with it s few knee buckling bounces on the trampoline at the end of gymnastics class, for the life of me I don't know how she would have injured herself!
My poor baby.... But I now understand the reaction to every bump, bruise, scrape, stomachache, etc being "You're fine!" when I was growing up. Because as a mother I you are only human, and how many times can you hear "WOLF!" before you stop believing? My brothers and I were always hurt now that I think about it. Funny enough, a lot of my injuries were knee injuries. Altough I broke a few fingers, needed a few stiches and did rupture my apendix.... There were numerous bicycle injuries, river injuries, sports injuries, I was a walking injury and there were two boys behind me in my family. All I can say now is that "I finally get it..." And either way... discovering my mother wasn't really the bad guy when she didn't believe us..... and feeling like the bad guy for not believeing Gigi - It's not a very good place to be. I will not sleep well tonight. But I know, without a doubt, I will be here again. I will brush off another injury or illness only to find out they weren't faking.... I am afterall , only human.