A letter to my daughters...

I know that it has been months since I've posted anything. I think in my heart I'd hoped that if I stopped sriting it all down it wouldn't be happening. G is on her way to Kindergarten in August and Lu is all grown up.... It is all going way to quickly.

I am wrapping up my third session of Body Back next week and was aked to write a letter to my daughters telling them why I am doing Body Back. I thought I would share it here....

My Dearest Grace Elizabeth and Lily Kathryn,

I am writing to you to explain why I do the crazy sweaty things I do.  I am writing so that you might understand that as much as it’s for me, it is also very much for you, my beautiful daughters. When I started my third session of Body Back a few weeks ago I was asked once again to provide a photo. I knew from past experience that this photo was meant to push me, to motivate me when I was ready to quit to push just a little bit harder.  I was supposed to look down, see this photo and realize what I am doing this for, who I am doing this for. In the past what is generally expected is a family photo. This time however I briefly entertained a bringing photo of me taken at the finish line of the Tough Mudder.  I say briefly because as soon as my brain processed the thought “Uugh, I look so gross and out of shape. I need to use this to motivate my fat ass” I was struck by an epiphany… Gross and Out of Shape? Fat Ass? I had just finished the Tough Fricking Mudder.  Not just finished but actually completed ALL but one obstacle. I had proved myself strong, determined and I had faced some real  fears head on and conquered them. Not only that , but I had fun I was with your father and I was among friends. I pushed myself, tested myself and discovered what I was made of. WHY? Why on earth was I ashamed of my body after such a monumental physical and mental victory? How many people can or even have done what I had just done? What would I say, feel or think if one of you had just done something that amazing and then tore yourself down physically right after? The thought shattered my heart…And completely changed the course of Body Back for me this time around.

I don’t go to Body Back or Stroller Strides or train for and run half marathons to be a size 4. I don’t work hard to starve myself or judge myself, my worth or my success by a number on a scale. I am so much more than that number on that silly scale. And I still and always believe that life is too short to diet. We make good choices in our house. We indulge in treats from time to time, but food is not the enemy.  Put that out of your minds right now and don’t ever let anyone tell you that it is either. Food is fuel. Fuel your body right, take care of it and you will never have to “diet” a day in your life.

Why do I go to Body Back?  I go to get stronger and faster and to push my limits… And then push past them. I go to hang medals and race bibs and orange sweat bands on the living room wall so that you’ll know if you work hard and set a goal you can do ANYTHING.  I go to show you my beautiful daughters that strength and beauty start from within and that girls can do and be anything. We can be just as strong as boys and sometimes stronger. I go because I have found sisterhood in motherhood and I want you to see healthy female relationships so that you will know how to have them when you are older. I go to get away, because as much as I love you and your daddy and I do live to be your mother and his wife, it is important to have time to just be…. Be alone, be with friends, be strong, weak, sad, happy, reflective, angry, or one with the wind, road, or sunrise/set. I go to be free and better and I go because I love you.

Never forget you are capable of so much more than you believe. You are so much stronger than you know.

"Believe that you can run farther or faster. Believe that you're young enough, old enough, strong enough, and so on to accomplish everything you want to do. Don't let worn-out beliefs stop you from moving beyond yourself."
-John Bingham

With all the love in my heart,

Mommy

Chasing.... { wait... scratch that } "Choosing" JOY!

I have essentially been either sick or injured since my half marathon in November. The holidays came and went and now I am staring down the barrel of my next half marathon. Yup, President's weekend I am running another half marathon. All I can say is; It sounded good at the time...

A few weeks ago I ran 6 miles and was so happy with that run that I immediately went to workout with my friends. 3 minutes into that workout I knew something was wrong. I was in that STOP this is bad kind of pain. Not the push through, gut it out, woman-up kind of pain, but this is BAD. So I listened, I rested, I iced, I foam rolled, I stretched, I took care of myself.  I didn't run again, until....

Last week. Last week was the Tough Mudder-- Forget the sprained knee, I aggravated my ITBS a few miles before I even fell from that wall and hit the ground wrong. Grrrr.... Doubt set in: I haven't trained and I am supposed to run a half marathon in a month, how am I going to do this? I cannot even get halfway through a 12.5 mile run without feeling like I might pass out from the pain. What am I thinking??

Yup. I'm a quitter..... I start lots of things I never finish.... I'm flighty.... but I am also stubborn, As. A. Mule. So, tonight I strapped on my running shoes {yes, my silly, ugly, fugly, ridiculous, mockable running shoes - and I love 'em} and I ran out the door for a traveling Body Back class. Determined to use tonight's class as a litmus test for how I'll do in next month's half marathon. The class, had me frustrated early on. I ate too heavy a meal beforehand and not only had lead in my belly but my legs felt boggy and I felt like I was running through molasses. My knee started to bother me half way through, all I could think was how tired, heavy, slow, achy I felt. Then my focus turned to my knee, was it bothering me? Was it in my head? Could I readjust? Could I change my gait, stride, pace.... Thinking....thinking...thinking....

ENOUGH!

Here's what I am walking away with from tonight's class....

Great job Shelb! You not only got one, but TWO workouts in today. The first with only one child today at Stroller Strides. Then....You were kid free {woo-hoo!!}  at Body Back for your second, with some amazing women, out in the fresh air, getting your sweat on. BRAVO Mama!  BRAVO!

The traveling class wasn't really all that brutal -- But being stuck in my head, in a negative space was. If I had just let go and stopped thinking, I might have enjoyed the class more. In retrospect, I really did have a good class, if I censor my thoughts and simply leave them on the cutting room floor,  what I did physically was pretty fabulous!

I cannot use a Body Back traveling class to determine if I can or cannot run a half marathon on too little training, pain-free. See, trying to keep up with {read: right on the heels of}  'Sound Barrier Busting Nielsen', stopping and starting, circling back, catching up, slowing down, fitting different stations in every few miles, there is simply no getting into a groove. I can never just let go, relax and run... So trying to base how I will fare in a run, off of how I did during a traveling class is a bad idea!

I can run this next half marathon. It might not be as pretty as my half in November. It might not be as fast as my half in November, and without a doubt my goal of a 2 hour or dream of a sub 2 hour half is gone.  Let it go.... Run. Walk. It doesn't matter.

Choosing Joy. Noting worth accomplishing is easy, and I did not do a great job training for this next marathon, so it truly will not be easy. Not and easy run and I am sure a difficult recovery. But in the end I will have one more bib and one more medal on my wall and one more experience with some of my favorite women and that will be well worth all the pain.

No more negative thoughts, no more fear.....it will be whatever it will be and I am still braver than those too afraid to try....

The miracle is not that I finished, the miracle is that I had the courage to start.
~John Bingham

It's about the journey. . . Not the destination

I started this journey almost exactly one year ago. Honestly though, it feels like just yesterday. {How quickly a year can pass} For me, this was one of those journeys that began with so much trepidation, I wasn't even sure I was moving forward until I was already well on my way.

Last October, shortly after my 34th birthday I lost a good friend over the whole "Princes debacle" and then I  ran my first 5k.  Fueled by a determination to set the anti-princess example for my girls without preaching it, the pain over the loss of someone I once considered a dear friend and a sense of empowerment and accomplishment I put one foot in front of the other and moved toward 35 with a dream, that quickly became a plan and before I knew it, a mission. I wanted to OWN 35 and be fearless!

{okay and maybe a little bit fierce!}

~ Girl Power  ~

Somewhere along the way the P.E. Teacher in me got swallowed up by the flight attendant, and then eventually by the mom. Thankfully though, mom's are smart and this one straightened up and started to fly right. If it was important for my kids to get at least 60 minutes of good physical activity a day, why wasn't it important for me to do the same?  The answer is: IT IS!  At this point, I'd already been working out a few times a week with Stroller Strides. Undoubtably this was an excellent example to set for my girls, but it was time to step it up, so I did.  I attended more classes each week and made a stronger commitment to make it to class.  Hey Gigi and Lula.... Strong is the new beautiful!

~ Girl Power{ful} ~

By April I'd been working hard  and I started to realize that the excuse 'I didn't want anyone getting in my face yelling at me' was really just fear.  {Lame excuse, huh?}  Once I admitted to myself that fear was natural and facing your fears powerful I was able to take the leap; I joined my already fearless friends and committed to 8 weeks of  Body Back boot camp. That 8 weeks was physically and emotionally HARD. Like, hard-core HARD. There were tears and wicked sore muscles and doubt and at more than one point I was pretty sure I was going to die --  But I survived. Not only did I survive, I improved. I was stronger, faster and determined. I was leaner and I was hungry for more. I found a new drug and it was pushing my limits. I WAS HOOKED!! 

Our mantra was:

If I am still standing at the end of Body Back, hit me with a board and knock me down, because it means I haven't given everything I have.  No regrets!

So..... of course I signed up for 8 more weeks!! Surrounded by amazing women, getting a few hours a week to myself to workout, work on me and get composed so that I could go back and be the best mother and wife I could be was priceless.  I was now aware that if I wanted to do something I needed to Just Do It! {Yeah, Nike really did get that one right, didn't they?}  What was holding me back?  Would I want the girls to hold themselves back??  No! I would tell them: You never know until you try; and if you give it your all you cannot fail.

Failure is an attitude of mind.

Set the example Shelbi!  Don't only do the things you know you will be good at. Try things that are hard, so something you are not sure you can. So by June I had stopped "talking" about running a half marathon. I had decided that I WAS going to run a half marathon.  I stopped saying 'I can't...'  -  'I won't'....  and  'I'd never be able to...' and I started saying  'I WILL !'


~ My Journey ~


I've had sore muscles, pulled hamstrings, aching joints and pain. I was pushing 35, clearly I am not a kid anymore. But I would turn 35 and celebrate by completing my first half marathon!  Eyes on the prize.........
There were days I didn't want to.
There were days I didn't think I could.
There were days I just didn't have anything left.
More pain
MORE PRIDE
Even a stress fractured tibia that sidelined me for 8 weeks.
Anything that costs this much and causes you to work this hard for it, must be worth it! 


Hey Gigi and Lula....... life doesn't end when you become a mom.
35 is not over the hill or washed up.
THIS is the prime of my life because I decided it should be.
I am determined.
I. am. a. girl. and I CAN DO ANYTHING!
{I can do anything a boy can do and some things I can even do better!}

On my journey to this half marathon...
I have kicked myself when I was down.
I have been hard on myself. 
I have been disappointed in myself.
And at times.... not at all kind to myself. 

But I now know how stupid that is!  Not every run is a good one. But the hardest step for a runner is the first one out the door. So even when the run was hard, or painful or disappointing I was out there and I was doing it.  That in itself is a WIN! So what if I wasn't the fastest runner out there? I was lapping everyone on the couch! 

All of those bad days, hard runs, tears and pain got me here today. I have loved and at times hated my 4am alarm. I have wondered "What the Hell I am doing/thinking??" as I wandered bleery eyed through my days after waking at the crack-of-dawn to run with my girlfriends. Last Sunday I ran 11 miles. The farthest I have ever run in my life!!! This morning, after running a very painful 5am 5 miles yesterday with Body Back I lept from my bed at 4am to run my last training run with some of the best training partners in the world! Held together by duct tape... Okay, really by the miracle that is KT Tape and in my trusty old Nikes I hit the road before dawn for this last 8 'training' miles.

This morning, in the dark, under the stars and with the "cold" air making my nose and cheeks feel chilled I reflected on all that has brought me to this point. . . . . . . .  12 months ago I had to will myself to keep running for 3.1 miles. I had to talk to myself the entire way. "Breathe. Keep going, You can do it. Relax. Breathe"  Today 3 miles feels like a cake walk and leaves me wanting more. . . . . . .   Last year I knew and liked my training partners, today I *know* and love them. I've sweat with them, cried with them, been victorious with them and been at my most raw and vulnerable with them. Today the women who were my friends a year ago are now my sisters. And after I reflected for a few miles about how grateful I am to be on this amazing journey - I let go. 

It's possible that I let go for the first time ever while running.
I wasn't in my head.
I wasn't worried about my pace,
keeping up,
catching up,
finishing first,
not finishing last,
finishing at all....
Instead of hiding behind my visor with my head down trying not to look ahead at how much farther I need to go . . . how big the hill in front of me is . . . how far away the finish line is. . .  I held my head up. I ran with my chest proud, my shoulders back and down and my eyes front.  I listened to the music in my ears and I just ran.... and it was amazing!

All of this... these months of running. All of the crack-of-dawn miles now under my belt.... they are a marathon in themselves.  If  I was too foolish to enjoy them, take pride in them, stop and drink in the moment.... I will not make that mistake again.  This entire journey has been a victory for me.  I have learned a lot about myself this past 12 months.  I now know what I am made of. 

My amazing Stroller Stirides and Body Back instructor Kelly tells us at the most difficult moments during Body Back "Show yourself!"   Next Sunday, that is exactly what I am going to do. And while I will be pushing myself and digging deep - Next Sunday... no matter what, I plan to savor every mile.


Next up...... The Tough Mudder! 11 miles of INSANITY!
I CANNOT WAIT!

Can you tell I've been avoiding my blog??

Seriously, is it obvious that I have been avoiding you all? It's not you, it's me.  I am stuck on one small negative moment from a fantabulous 8 week experience and I cannot bring myself to blog about that fabulous first 8 weeks of Body Back without spilling my guts about one small negative {only in my mind} thing that I am allowing to ruin an entire 8 week experience. It's me, it's my competitive side and I keep telling myself once I get out of my own way and get over this one little thing I can and will blog about my 3" smaller waist line and my ability to do more than zero sit-ups, my 5 mile run with a boulder and all of the other fantastic, strong and empowering experiences, but... well I am not there yet. But I'm working on it... and I am also working on a 2nd 8 week session of Body Back. I'm 3 weeks in and doing my best to kick some ass and take some names... The heat is a gigantic obstacle, but I will kick it's ass too!

So in an effort to ease back into my blog and still avoid the looming Body Back post I am accepting my dear friend Mel's 30 day challenge!  I adore my camera and it just seems like a fun and whimsical way to both blog and play around with my camera. No pressure just me, my Canon and you. If you have a camera, like to take pictures and think you might want to join us.... feel free!  Here's the challenge......

Time Marches on......

My first session of Body Back ended last week. My results were fantastic. I am in love. I am addicted. I have a few things to share.....


Gigi turned FOUR..... {a month ago}


Lula is potty trained...... {for months now}
 
Our garden is yielding us some fantastic fruit.....
 
The girls rescued from Handsome Hal and played with a lizard for hours last week.....
 
Gigi can *full on swim*... No help.... no adult required.... swim.... dive... dive for rings..... SWIM!....
 
Life goes on.... and on.... and on......
 
A ton is happening.....and me...... I'm too busy living it to stop and blog about it.... But I will. I want to remember all of this one day. Guess I better get crackin'!









Gigi finished her first year of preschool..... {a month ago}

Project Body Back : Weeks 3, 4 and 5

I truly believed when I started this Body Back journey that I would be overflowing with blog posts. I've heard of other's experiences, trials and triumphs; even read about a few. I know many women who have made this journey before me and I was sure that there would be no shortage of things to say. I even looked forward to helping Stroller Strides spread the word about this amazing, life altering, beautiful, difficult, special program. Then I started out on my Body Back path....

The program is everything wonderful, life changing, inspiring and just as emotional as everyone said it would be.  I have shed at least one tear every class {and I am not an emotional person, at least not in 'that' way}. I have been angry, inspired, loved, supported. I have pushed and supported and cried with and for other women. And, I have found true sisterhood....

I have gained and lost weight. Done things that I was unaware my body was capable of. Taken on a hill with a ten pound weight and OWNED it. Opened up my heart about things that are painful in my life the pushed through a brutal workout fueled by that pain and left feeling healed. Trusted and given everything. Kept my promise to myself leave it all out there every workout and have thoroughly become addicted to the feeling of empowerment when you kick box for 60 minutes holding two 10lb weights.

But the one thing I did not count on was how personal this journey would be. Unless you have been there. Unless you are there with me.... I simply do not have words to do this program justice.  I do not share the same journey as any other women out there. My path is not the same. My end result, my discoveries about myself and my capabilities may be similar to someone else's, but will never be the same.

As much as I want to shout from the mountain tops that Body Back is the best thing I have ever done for myself {and it is -- by far!} As much as I want to convince every mother out there regardless of their age, their children's ages and regardless of their current physical state that this is a must take journey for every mother; The way I see Body Back and the way I experience Body Back feels like something to be kept just for me.

I still promise to share my before and after photos. I will happily disclose my measurements and current weight. If you want to see and hear about my results, I am thrilled to be able to share those.... But as for my frustration, tears, cheers and triumphs..... Those stories are just for me and the amazing women who are playing such a major roll in this journey.

{And to you women, my life is forever changed because of YOU. each and everyone one of you have left your mark on my life and given me something that I will carry with me forever.}

I am not as close to the end as I thought I would be.  The Body Back sessions may only run for 8 weeks but I will not be nearly done when this session is up. I am signed on and very much looking forward to a 2nd 8 week session starting mid June!


Breathe Deeply and appreciate the moment. Living in the moment could be the meaning of life.

 

Project Body Back: Week Two Eloquence lost

{ Yup - That's what the scale actually read on my first weigh in! }

I *LOVE* Body Back!

It's brutal hard. It has made me cry. It has held a mirror up that I have been refusing to look at for a while now. It's empowering, exhausting, exasperating and without a doubt the best thing I have ever done for myself!

BUT...... The wheels fell off the wagon this week...........................The meal plan and I are not friends.My food diary and I are full on enemies. I need to mbrace {That's for you Mel!} these two aspects of Body Back, yet I kind of have this snotty attitude towards them. It's not good..... I am only screwing myself.  I really do want to get on board, but this week has been filled with a lot of excuses, and a lot of emotion and A LOT of children. So........ starting Monday..... I'm on board. Me, the Meal Plan and My Food Journal will be BFF's..... Okay We won't be BFF's but we will be friends. Alright, I might actually, talk sh*t about them behind their backs, but they will think we're tight!

My first weigh-in showed a number that surprised me and disappointed me a little. My second weigh-in showed a one pound weight gain! Despite a great effort to eat right, follow a revised version of the meal plan and writing everything down, I gained a pound.  I GAINED AN EFFING POUND!!!!!  This took me from having a not so good week to being full on pissed off. Pissed off after telling myself before weigh in, that the scale doesn't matter; I then became pissed that I was pissed.

I tried to work all of my anger out during that night's brutal rounds class.  I shed a few tears while pushing myself to go all out. Then swallowed back a bunch of tears when it was all over and tired to put the past behind me...Put my best foot forward and move on from there with a new determination. Ah - yeah.....It lasted all of an hour.  At about 9pm I was still annoyed. With what exactly I wasn't sure but although I felt as if I'd left it all on the court, I hadn't left my frustration. So....... I did the only logical thing I could think of..... I poured myself a double Vodka.

Thirty minutes later, still not feeling any better I did the next logical thing I could think of..... I ate a sleeve of Pepperidge Farms Shortbread cookies.

Not my finest hour....

I was only moderately good about my eating for the rest of the week.  A friend in crisis, a house filled with children, only half of which were mine and friends coming into town for the weekend didn't do a lot to help with my 2-a-day workout schedule, so I fear week 2 is shot.....

I has not been a total loss. I did run 5.12 miles yesterday morning. Shaving 4 minutes off of my previous time for the same distance!! This morning's Body Back class was a traveling class and I ran 4 miles there. {I must say, to date the traveling class his been my favorite - But there is something cathartic about running...} I deeply fear the scale tomorrow night {3 night's early by the way, thanks to the OC Marathon}

I would love to wax poetic about how life changing Body Back is {and it is} but I am exhausted. I have been avoiding this post for days for a number a reasons- Not the least of which is my loss of eloquence. I just don't know what to say.  My girlfriend Mel said it best in her post about this week..... If you don't have anything nice to say.....

I want to be proud of myself.... I *AM* proud of myself.... But I am disappointed too. I think I have been waiting for me head to be in a better place. I have been waiting for a moment when I could let go of the scale, pat myself on the back for the work that I did. Take some pride in my new milestone distance of 5.12 miles.....

I can already see that 8 weeks is not going to be enough. It is going to take me 8 weeks to get to a point where I can forgive myself. It is going to take me 8 weeks {at least} to learn how to be kind to myself.  Maybe that should be my goal - "Learn how to cheer for Shelbi."........Oh and to have those "guns" that Kelly told me I'd have at the end of the 8 weeks.  Arms like Michelle Obama is absolutely a goal of mine!!

Two weeks down, four more to go. I am so happy that I am on this journey! I already know why so many of the Mamas are back for their second and third sessions. 

Don't forget to link your Body Back Blog posts below....

Project Body Back: I have been weighed - I have been measured - and I have been found wanting.

Do you ever feel like a plastic bag

Drifting through the wind

Wanting to start again

Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin

Like a house of cards

One blow from caving in

Do you ever feel already buried deep

Six feet under scream

But no one seems to hear a thing

Do you know that there's still a chance for you

Cause there's a spark in you

You just gotta ignite the light

And let it shine

Just own the night

Like the Fourth of July

Cause baby you're a firework



This song came on as I was driving home from my first Body Back Class tonight. With windows down, wind blowing and radio blaring I really needed to hear this song!  I had no illusions that Body Back was going to be anything less than hard. In fact I was sure that I would discover that I had a lot further to go than I expected going in; but I was not prepared to discover that I am no nearly as strong as I thought I was.

It was a truly eye opening experience. YES. I have had 2 children in the last 4 years. YES I have had 2 Ceserian sections. BUT I have been working out steadily with Stroller Strides for over a year now. I am unable to complete one full sit up. That's right folks. With feet firmly planted, hands behind my head and both remaining in said positions.... I.Cannot.Sit-up.Once. Not one time.....*Gulp*

My saving grace... The one small victory that I am clinging to.... Of the first time Body Back Mamas tonight, I held my plank the longest. NO. I know that it it not a competition, but in order for me to dig deep I had to set a goal to hold my plank longer than every other mama.  With each mom the dropped I feel deeper and deeper into Lamaze breathing. {You know the natural childbirth class that helps you breath through the pain..... t\The breathing technique that you don't need when you have 2 c-sections!  I am SO GLAD I took that class now! It was not a waste of a Saturday afternoon {four years ago} after all!!} 3 minutes and 8 seconds later I called time. Last Mama Standing. Or rather.... Last Mama Planking!!  WIN! {I'll take it!}

I'm still a caterpillar, but I will be a butterfly! I have a long way to go. I am not yet freakishly strong, but that.... That is my Body Back goal.... I want to be freakishly strong! {Oh...... That and do at least one full sit-up!}

•Breathe deeply and appreciate the moment. Living in the moment could be the meaning of life.

Even if you have already linked a Body Back, Stroller Strides or Personal Fitness Blog post to my first week's Journey feel free to add your current post as well if you have one! Keep sharing your stories!!

Project Stroller Strides: Mama On A Mission

Okay, Yesterday I posted about my first 12 months of Stroller Strides, my accomplishments and my new plan. Today I am here to start blogging officially about Body Back.

I debated starting a separate blog dedicated to my Body Back Journey but honestly..... We have all discovered I have commitment issues. My ADD gets me all ramped up to start these great projects and in the end all I am left with is a mountain of half finished failures.  I am tired of abandoning things and tired of having to face my nearest and dearest when my interest or energy in yet another project fizzles out.  The safest way to do this is to keep Body Back as part of my Project Stroller Strides series and keep it right here.  SO for those of you who come here to laugh at my Mishaps and shake your heads at my Musings and cheer on my Milestones.... feel free to tune out when I go on about Body Back or..... Instead join me.  Find a Body Back Class, or a Stroller Strides or make a commitment to get your sweat on along with me!  For some of you this might be your chance to take some great advice from my new favorite company Lululemon and "Do one thing each day that scares you" Trust me, I know that exercise can be scary!!

Today is my last day to splurge but honestly.... Except for the half a bottle of wine that will be calling my name to finish tonight.... I don't much feel like Death By Chocolate Cake or Ice Cream or even a Cheeseburger.... So I am not going to force myself to indulge in something I am not in dire need of just because it's my last chance!  I may have to give myself a day or a night where I can indulge my need for a bit of liquid courage. Hubby is on the road all the time and bath/bed-time is about the end of my rope most days so.... For the children's sake {haha} I may have to allow myself a glass of wine once a week. We shall see...

The very best part of joining the Stroller Strides family has been Sisterhood in Motherhood. The unconditional support. The loud and resounding cheers of encouragement. The understanding and empathetic hand on a shoulder when needed....I know that tin order to get to the other side of this Body Back Journey I am going to have to rely on my Sister Mamas to push me, support me and encourage me. I also know that I am not the only Mama who feels this way about her Stroller Strides family; and those of us who blog, tweet or otherwise share our Stroller Strides and Body Back experiences, are so touched and motivated by strangers words of encouragement. So..... I will be adding a link to each Body Back post for the next 8 weeks. I encourage you to take this journey with me and share your ups, downs, challenges and triumphs with us. Link your blogs to A Mothers Musings and I promise to support your journey with all of my heart!

Ready?? Here We Go.....

"The conscious brain can only hold one thought at a time. Choose a Positive Thought!"

Project Stroller Strides: One Year and A New Plan Later....

For  Kelly,  Katie  and  Jill...

{ In my best Wizard of OZ voice: }

 Pay no attention to the 5lb weights in the photo - they will be 10lbs weights by Wednesday evening!

It doesn't seem possible that it has been a year! Just 13 months ago I wrote about using our Tax refund to pay for my newest attempt to recapture the glory days when I was... well in shape instead of a shape.  So... here we are, 12 months of Stroller Strides later and I am in shape. I still have a lot of work to do if I want to be 19 year old, Physical Education major fit again, but I have faith..... and a plan!

This year I went from not being able to run 30 yards to running my first ever 5k {3.1 miles}! I dropped 20 pounds, 2 dress sizes, and a full cup size. I will admit; I was not exactly thrilled about downsizing my bra - But I was ecstatic to be able to squeeze myself into some pre-wedding clothes!  My "baby weight" started a few years before the babies arrived, so forget about pre-baby, I wanted pre-married Shelbi back!

I have been running on a semi-regular basis and am just about to start training for my first 1/2 Marathon {13.1 miles}.  The Long Beach, California Marathon/Half Marathon coincides with my 35th birthday this year. I took that as a sign.... Turn 35 and run a half marathon! What better way to celebrate my mid-thirties, right??

Time to step it up, get off the plateau that I am on and take my health and fitness to the next level!  I find myself living life according to Nike slogans these days. But honestly they are motivational!!  So for me.... Strong is The New Beautiful and You Can't Finish if You Don't Start and always JUST DO IT! So Wednesday evening I get my butt out there sans-kiddos, join some of my dearest mama friends and for the next 8 weeks I push myself to my physical and mental limit.  I am removing "I Can't" from my vocabulary and replacing it with "I WILL!" even if it's only "I will be capable of that by the end of this eight weeks!"

So here I am standing on the edge, toeing the line with no idea what truly lies ahead of me. But knowing full well that I am about to take a step that will forever change me. I am excited!!

For the next eight weeks I will be one of 16 women participating in Mama Wants Her Body Back!  A no holds barred Mama boot camp. No kids, just 16 women, raw emotions, sweat, tears and a goal. My goal... what I want to get out of Body Back.... I cannot say just yet. I have been thinking about it for a while.  Would I like to drop a few more pounds.... Yes, I suppose I would but I also know that muscle weighs more than fat so....  I would happily drop another dress size.  I would like to run farther and faster. I would like to be stronger.  Honestly I think I would like to have a bikini body again. {Oh... I don't want to wear a bikini, I would just like to be able to if I so desired}

What I want to do for the next 8 weeks. I want to leave it all on the field, pavement, mountain, etc... I want to give 120% and collapse knowing that I could not have given it one ounce more because I honestly and physically didn't have another ounce. I want give it up and let go and push myself past my breaking point because I am sure that I am capable of so much more than I give myself credit for. I want to do one more push-up when my arms and head are screaming "Not. Gonna. Happen!" I want to sink  1" deeper into that wall sit when my legs are shaking so violently that I am sure my muscles are tearing. I want to dig deep and sprint that last few yards when everything in me says stop or you are going to vomit and my legs feel like cement and I can barely lift them.  I want to know that I did everything I could possibly do and then I pushed just a little bit further to make sure.

Here is a before and after shot of me from this past year. Granted NOT the best examples of Fat Me and Less-Fat Me! Funny how every photo taken of you for so long looks like Shamu, but when you need to find one of those horrific photos you cannot come across one!  I promise to share true Biggest Loser style Before and After shot for this newest journey to get my Body Back! Wish me luck!!





Before Stroller Strides

       

After 12 months of Stroller Strides




 

•The world is changing at such a rapid rate that waiting to implement changes will leave you 2 steps behind. DO IT NOW, DO IT NOW, DO IT NOW!

Body Back® is the newest program release from Stroller Strides' founder Lisa Druxman. It is a results-based workout designed specifically for moms. Whether they just had a baby or had a baby twenty years ago, it will help any mom get her body back. Most importantly, it will help moms unlock their personal possibilities in an inspiring and powerful environment.
Body Back® clients experience targeted high-intensity workouts, inspiration and motivation in every class. When done in conjunction with Lisa's Mama Wants Her Body Back meal plan and workout DVDs, you have a surefire combination for success.

{Project Simplify}